Just to vent:

My husband and I have been ttc for 17 months. As you can imagine, going this long ttc has been frustrating. Especially since we’re in our mid twenties.

So, we’ve been referred to an ob specialist, as I’ve maxed out what my midwife can do to help us conceive.

The dr she referred us to was awful.

1.) I sat in the waiting room for an HOUR after my scheduled appointment before they called me back.

2.) I didn’t get to see the actual dr I was referred to, made the appointment with, and was paying for. I saw her PA.

3.) the PA didn’t tell me anything I didn’t already know about my pcos. I was grilled and ridiculed for my weight. (“There’s no way you eat healthy. Your BMI is elevated.”)

4.) all of my questions and ideas were dismissed. Apparently as a nurse, and a patient who’s done her research, I don’t know anything about the treatments and my questions are dumb.

5.) They want us to ttc for ANOTHER YEAR before they’ll put me on any type of meds to help me ovulate. I have pcos. I don’t ovulate.

6.) I was questioned about my diagnosis of pcos (“how do you know that you have pcos? Were you actually ever diagnosed by a physician? Or did you just diagnose yourself?”) - bitch. If you looked at my labs that are readily available to you from the time I was a teenager, you’d see that I’ve been diagnosed several times by several different physicians.

7.) they put me on synthroid, even though my labs were normal 🙄 - I mean, fine. It’s just synthroid.

8.) I was told I’d need to check my tsh levels and they asked where I wanted to get it checked. I gave them my pcp’s office because it’s closer to where I live... AND THE DOC NEVER FILLED OUT THE ORDER TO BE SENT. Then called me back and made it out to be my fault.

9.) when I said that I was going to get a second opinion and voiced my concerns, letting her know that I felt like she was adding to my stress because it felt like she wasn’t taking me seriously, the petty bitch refused to refill my synthroid prescription. 🙄

I’m just so done. I’m one of the most understanding and am a patient with loads of patience. I work in healthcare. I get it.

But I also expect a certain level of teamwork with me from my physician. I expect to be heard, not railroaded. I expect to actually see the doctor that I made the appointment with and am being charged for. And I’m not afraid to tell my doc what I think. They should be grown up enough to accept some criticism and actually work with me.

That’s why I LOVE my midwife. She listens to me and hears my thoughts and opinions. And if she doesn’t agree with me, we talk about it. And if I don’t agree with her, we talk about it. I think that some of these docs get away with taking advantage of women who don’t know and then when someone comes along who actually has a plan and opinions, they don’t know what to do. As a nurse, I know when docs are blowing smoke up my ass. I know when they need to be called out, and I’m not afraid to do so.

But needless to say, I’ve got an appointment with a new ob on Tuesday.

Bottom line: I’m trying to have a baby. The fact that I can’t do it on my own is stressful enough. I shouldn’t be extra stressed because it feels like my doc, who’s supposed to be helping me have a baby, doesn’t care.