Hey ladies I know I haven't been on this app in 3 years the last time I was on here I was pregnant with my beautiful baby girl but while I was pregnant with her she passed away she died in my belly at a little over 9 weeks and she was doing very well she was growing every week would go see her listen to her heart beat measure her and everything and at our high-tech ultrasound to measure her spine and brain and everything they told us that she had died n her heart had stopped and she was no longer with us finding out that I lost my 4th child has devastated me. Hurt me so much that I felt like I was losing all control of myself I felt as if I would never be happy again and within that year of dealing with the loss my husband asked for a divorce I felt so alone not having anyone to be there for me and understanding my pain + feeling like my husband forgot about the pain I was going through an act like I wasn't hurting because he was hurting. Losing a child will always hurt and now I'm going to be 32 years old and have to start my life all over again and I feel like I'm running out of time to be a mom because after 35 is high-risk it's not good you're risking your baby's life being greedy trying to get pregnant after 35 isnt the right way to go and I don't know what I would do if I never got pregnant again or if I got pregnant at late age because I don't believe in abortion. I always pray that it's not too late and then I get to finally become a mom and be happy.