My husband sexually assaulted and raped me.

Earlier we had a good day. Then he started pushing buttons and irritating me. We got into an arguement. He told me to take care of him. When I said no, he said I was defective and he was going to replace me. Then told me to go to bed.

About a minute after I laid down he grabbed my hair, he insulted me and I said don't be an asshole. He grabbed my hair again, also grabbed my breast, my shoulder, wrapped his body around mine and squeezed. Got close to my face and kept hissing "what did you fucking say?" I begged him to let go. He finally did. And I couldn't move, I was in shock.

He insisted I be a "good girl" and take care of him. Demanded I lick his balls. I tried to refuse and was just short of hyperventilating. He grabbed me and forced me down on him. Made me lick and suck him, then made me lick his asshole which is something I hate doing. The whole time my nose was running and hard to breathe, he just kept face fucking me.

He said didn't want to hurt me. I said too late, and he said well if it's too late anyways...

He then got me on my stomach and started fucking my pussy all while I cried. Pulled me into doggy style. Told me if I wanted to stop he would (liar). He flipped me over onto my back after he could tell he was hurting me, but insulted me and said I was being bad for not taking it like a slut.

I thought he was almost done. Then he informed me that he would be fucking my ass, that good dirty sluts like their asses fucked and that's what I am. He tried first with little lube. I convinced him to get more lube and a vibrator to help everything. He was going to do it, I didn't want it to be super painful. After a few minutes he came in my ass.

I went into the shower and cried softly. I've been in here over an hour now. I'm pretty sure he's asleep.

Some notes: we have been together 14 years, married for 9. We have 2 kids. I'm 6 months pp. He's increasingly complained about being sexually frustrated over this last year between pregnancy and postpartum.