need advice

I didn’t have a good childhood due to my parents separating, i didn’t get to see my dad or his family often. Every then and there I would cry which I thought it was normal. But it’s too late to see him since he passed away and also my grandma who I adored i didn’t get to say good bye which hurts me till this day that was the last thing she wanted to do before she died see my siblings and I. Since I was 14 till now 18 I would cry myself to sleep and I would just get super emotional and burst because I can’t talk to anyone about it. I cry for little things i don’t know what’s wrong with me I hate feeling like this. I just need some help. It doesn’t happen often at least twice a month I cry over the situation