On Friday we're invited to my husband's aunts birthday party. She's turning 55. She has asked for money for her birthday. I don't feel comfortable giving grown ups money for their birthday, it just feels wrong to me. Especially since I don't know how much they expect to get? We don't have a lot and are expecting our second baby in a few months. But I think my main problem is that she is a hoarder. Like a true one. Her house is full of stuff and she recently bought a barn to keep even more stuff in. It's already full. Now she's a grown up and I can't dictate how she's living her life, but I'm afraid by giving her money we'll just contribute to her hoarding issues. Would it be rude of us to get her a nice bottle of wine instead? She really loves wine. What would you do?