We’re in the middle of a hurricane right now, and ALL my family is jumping down my throat to leave my house and go stay at a family members “because it’s safer”. They’re literally threatened to come take my baby if I don’t leave. And then they’ve been coming in and out telling me to “pack my shit” and go to my nanny’s house. My house is perfectly fine, we still had power and it was barley a category 1. Anyways, that built up a lot of tension for me because literally all my life they all controlled what i did. My aunt, uncle, nanny, mother, everyone. Now i’m an adult with a family and they’re still doing it. But anyways it made me upset and I literally just couldn’t take it anymore and i started yelling and venting to myself as I walked around the house packing. That’s just how I get bottled up feelings out. Well my boyfriend got in my face and started literally screaming at me at the top of his lungs telling me he’s “tired of my shit”. I wasn’t yelling at him, I just desperately needed to vent and that’s how I’ve always done it. I’m not used to living with another person, all my life my mom was literally never home so i’ve basically been alone since i was 8, my family lives in houses next door so they just used to come check on me. Anyways living with him is all new to me. I’m a stay at home mom now, with literally NO friends at all, all day i talk to nobody, and never get out the house. Meanwhile he gets to go to work with his friends and mess around with them and socialize and get out. Of course I need to vent and everything because the way my life is drives me crazy. I regret choosing to settle down, I wanted to build a career, get my own house and just live life not be tied down with a boyfriend that doesn’t understand me and yells at me. And just all that plus literally being controlled by my family drives me insane. Now I don’t even want to look at him much less talk to him. I can’t believe he handled it that way and now i have zero respect for him. I feel like any feeling of love i’ve had for him is gone. I never want to open up to him ever again. And it’s not like I can leave, when he told me he’s had enough of my shit I told him to leave and he refused. We fought multiple times and he’s said every single time that he’s had enough but when I tell him it’s okay to leave he never does. I want out so bad. But I can literally call the cops, have them remove him, and he’ll be back the next day forcing himself in my life. He says he’ll get full custody of the baby because he works and I don’t. I just don’t know what to do. I’m literally at the point of killing my self because I can’t handle all of this. I’m never suicidal but tonight a grabbed a knife and made a cut.. i feel terrible about it. I feel like a horrible mom. But I just can’t handle all of this anymore and I never seem to get away 😔 just needed to get this off my chest and rant a little. If you read all of this thanks..