I’m 39w4d today. At my appt last week, I was 1cm dilated and had a soft cervix. So they told me I could probably get a membrane sweep at my next appt.

Today rolls around and I’m exactly the same as I was last week and baby girl is too high to do the sweep...

I’ve been patient this whole pregnancy and we were moving at 34 weeks, so I had been adamant that she could wait the whole time. But on Sunday, a flip switched and I *finally* felt like we were ready enough for our girl to be here.

So I’m disappointed today that I haven’t made any progress towards labor this week. I’m disappointed that it’s looking like she may go over her due date (Sunday, the 21st). I’m just disappointed.

And I’m annoyed by (well meaning, I’m sure) family members who keep pushing their timelines on me as to when baby should be born. From sisters who want it early so they can “play with the baby” from hour zero, to my MIL who wants her to come late so she will be present at the birth (but she’s also staying with us because she lives out of the country, so I won’t get the privacy I think I’ll need to heal, bond with baby, and figure shit out). Or my husband who wants the baby to come now-ish because he hasn’t started his new job yet and will be able to be here to take care of us.

And I’m scared of the possibility of being induced. I’ve only heard/read things that inductions lead to more complications.

Sorry. I think I’m just overwhelmed. And I was getting excited thinking today might be the day. And now it’s looking like it’s not. I was very ready for her today.