dear me; i am (tw)

i am 21

i am kind

i am compassionate

i am generous

i am scarred

i am scared

let me speak in 3rd person

let me speak and let me be

i am who i am yet i am so unhappy

i am living a life with a voice very unheard

i am that person in the room who everyone over talks or interrupts

i am that person in the room who repeats herself two, three, four times before she gives up.

i am that girl who’s relapsed in february.

i am that girl that no longer survives but struggles one day at a time.

i am that girl from age 15 in high school to meet my maker or so i thought and went on to date that person for 7 years.

i am that girl who was in high school who self harmed, did drugs, and drunk alcohol.

i am that girl who was escorted by police because of my bullies.

i am not that girl who cried wolf.

but. i am that girl who cried herself to sleep every night.

i am that girl who burned/cut/scar her skin.

i am that ugly girl inside and out.

i am that girl who felt no love.

i am that girl who flinches

i am that girl who hid under big hoodies

i am that girl who built a shell like a hermit

i am that girl who’s never felt love or compassion a day in her life from anyone she’s met.

abuse in my home, family, relationship and school.

11:11 make a wish

i am that girl who suffered and sat back in a mentally abusive relationship for 7 years.

who took every lash and word to the bone.

i am that girl who ended up on medication and therapy.

i am that girl that took 4 months into therapy to break down and finally cry.

i am that girl who decided to leave.

i am that girl with no home.

i am that girl with no family.

i am that girl, a black sheep if you will.

i AM that girl living a life with a voice that goes unheard.

i am that girl going on 10 months, a bender of alcohol and self abuse.

i am that girl who found a new home in herself.

i am that girl in a new relationship.

i am that girl trying for a better life.

i am no longer that girl to beaten down and pushed to the curve.

i am kind.

i am compassionate.

i am generous.

i am a woman.

i am tired.