Boyfriend won’t have sex with me because vaginal secretions, what do I do?

To start I‘ve been with my boyfriend for almost two years and he was my first. I feel very lucky to have him and our personalities work well together and we always help each other grow.

My boyfriend isn’t fond of having period sex because of what comes out afterwards so we generally don’t have sex while I’m on my period which is alright with me. But recently after my period and sometimes before the thickness of the mucus is enough that when we have sex it is white and chunky. My boyfriend has recently just started to notice this being a reoccurring thing and he feels repulsed by it. He claims that he just doesn’t feel attracted and can’t get hard when it’s like that because it looks a bit like puss.

Normally I wouldn’t be bothered by this, but it’s been three weeks now combining my period and this, where I’m super horny and confused as to why he can’t get over something natural. He thinks I have a yeast infection or something not normal but it is oder-less and it isn’t itchy. I remember my vaginal secretions always being thick and clumpy sometimes during my menstrual cycle and I tried telling him that he’s overreacting and that he never paid attention to it till now.

I understand that he’s one of those guys more on the cleaner side of the neatness spectrum but I think it’s going a bit too far now. We have anal sex, and he has had sex with me on my period when it was light so I don’t understand why this is so bad.

I called the gynecologist and they haven’t gotten back to me. I don’t think I have a problem but I need to know because I don’t have many friends who have had sex who I can talk to. Is this normal? Is he being too squeamish? Is there something I can do about it? I’m starting to get extremely frustrated and stuck about all of this. Please help me.

376 views • 0 upvotes • 10 comments

COMMENT (10)

L

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He doesnt want to, he doesnt like the discharge. Its normal. Either get over it or move on to someone who is okay with it.

Ro

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Thick and chunky and looks like puss? Girl. That's not normal discharge. Go see a doctor.

Ro

Ro • Jul 19, 2019
I still think you need to go get a check up. 🤷🏽‍♀️

Ji

Ji • Jul 19, 2019
That’s his perspective but doesn’t actually look like puss

Na

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He can deny sex for whatever reason. If you can’t cope with that, then move on

Mi

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Sorry but, he doesn’t seem mature enough for sex. In my personal opinion.

Rh

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Speak to your Dr & gyno about it & you could even bring him along to the appointment so that he can learn about it & find out if it’s something to worry about of if it’s fine.

N

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Seems immature honestly..

Re

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When I got off the pill I struggled with this too. I dated a guy that was grossed out because I got “too wet” during certain times of the month. It made a mess on the sheets after sex, etc. The guys I’d dated in the past had loved this about me, and I got really self conscious that this guy was turned off by it!! I started keeping a towel nearby so I could “wipe down” during sex.. like in the middle of changing positions etc. Regardless, it did end up affecting our sex life and the relationship fizzled our. After a year or so of being off the pill it wasn’t as bad anymore, so I think it had a lot to do with hormones being out of whack. (Getting off the pill sends hormones in all crazy directions lol.) Now I take ashwagandha (natural herbal supplement) which helps keep my hormones balanced (helps with my skin, PMS, moodiness, periods, etc) and while I still have one or two days of “wetter” lubrication during sex, it’s not nearly as bad as it used to be. And my husband loves it, can’t get enough of it. Anyway that’s just my experience, and it might not have anything to do with yours! But perhaps yours has something to do with hormones, in which case you could talk to your doc or research some natural ways to balance your hormones. There are lots of herbal remedies, etc. But in the meantime, if your partner is making you feel self-conscious, unattractive or unworthy... maybe you can work through it. But know you deserve someone who loves you and is fully attracted to you, don’t settle for anything less.

Ji

Ji • Jul 19, 2019
I did recently change birth control a couple months ago and my doctor said it would take half a year before I started getting a regular schedule