i had to contact social services (CPS) for advice after my 10 month old lost her shit for not sleeping in mine and my husbands bed anymore

if put in her own bed she would scream and cry, pull bits of her own hair out and puke endlessly in what seemed like distress it was so traumatic to see and i just would come in cuddle her and change all her clothes bedding then bring her in and give in but social services has told me what to do along with a friend who has three kids which is let her puke up and do what she does, leave her in it and dont give in no matter what then another friend has told me not to do that soothe her and keep going in but im not getting any sleep if i do that method everyone who has done the strict way has worked even social services are telling me but then getting called abusive by some friends and family if i take that advice

please help me