when dealing with terrible 3's with your toddler is there a part of you that just wants to give up parenting??

Question

What drives you to stay? 
I'm currently dealing with a lot and overwhelmed by my 3yr son and lack of cooperation with listening 😢 Depressed In going to go through this phase with my 8m and unborn baby...

Answer

parenting can be so hard and exhausting. it’s okay to have those feelings sometimes. i struggled a lot with my three year old when i had a newborn.

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For me,  the question is less of 'what drives me to stay?' as it is 'what gets me through the day?'. I just take it day-by-day and know it isn't going to last forever. The mental energy to think of anything beyond the day is too much at this point anyway! I just hope she'll grow out of it soon. Toddlers are so unpredictable, they could wake up the next day and be in a different phase. Try to consistently encourage positive behavior.. maybe a sticker chart? I hope things get better!

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No, never. My child is 3 but it’s not the terrible 3s. My child is very calm. I wouldn’t ever give up being a parent. Parenting can be tough sometimes but there are lots of tools and books out there to help. 
I can’t imagine not being a mother. I’ve never ever thought about giving up and I never will. I want 3 more children. 
Maybe try some counseling and talking with your doctor about medication you can take. Try some parenting classes, yoga. There is a lot out there that can help you.

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The 3s are no joke! I was basically fine with the 2s (not so terrible), but the 3s... that's something else entirely. My daughter is really pretty good most of the time, but she's high energy, smart, and has a lot of opinions so... sometimes I just can't lol. I've never felt like giving up entirely, but sometimes I just don't have it in me to fight any more battles for the day, which is when I tend to utter the phrase "fine, whatever, I don't care". That's how she got a popsicle before dinner today. 🤷‍♀️ 
Maybe her plan is always to wear me down as much as possible during the day so that she has more wiggle room at night. If so, I have to applaud her for her commitment to playing the long game. Well played, tiny human. My pregnant body is no match for your perseverance. 😂

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I got lucky my little girl is angelic and quiet but trust me she has her moments but when she has her moments I stop what she is doing and what I am doing I get down to her level and I talk to her and I give her a big hug and eventually she will go back to being her normal happy quiet self , but somedays when it’s real bad I will lay her down for a nap and I will go into the bathroom and cry because I feel like I can’t do enough for her I feel like I’m failing when I don’t understand what is wrong but I have to tell Myself that one day she will be all grown up and she won’t want to do these little things anymore so I put on my best face and I push myself

Answer

At one point I had a newborn, a 1.5yo and a 2.5yo. The couple of years following that were very crazy, I honestly don't remember a lot of details lol. My youngest also has delays in many areas and wouldn't chew food until we was 4.5 years old. He just turned 6.
Anyway, sometimes it was a complete shit show (literally, SO. Freaking. Literally.), sometimes I would sit in the middle of the chaos and either just laugh or just cry (usually about an hour before dinner, that's when kids turn nutty as hell). I was angry a lot. It aged my husband and I about a decade each I think, not to mention tension on our marriage. There was a lot of screaming (from the kids). There wasn't much sleep for a while. There was a mustard stain on the ceiling for 2 years. 😂 There was a lot of laundry. There were cheerios in strange places. I'll stop now. So to answer your question: Yes.
But we made it, and every single second was worth it. I would do it all again. As far as any advice I can give, the thing that most helped us stay sane was a strict bedtime routine that we never ever wavered from, not for anyone or anything. We had a special song for bedtime, "the night-night train", It was easier to get through the day when we knew that bedtime would always come, and my husband and I looked forward to that song as much or more as the kids did. 
We are now due with baby number 4, very planned, and we are all very excited. After all of that, we were willing to do it all again, if that tells you anything. :)
They've grown out of their night time song now 😭 but they still remember it, and are looking forward to singing it to their little brother who is due to arrive in september.

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Dealing with the threenager stage can be so difficult. I'm lucky my 3 year old isn't too bad but my 2 year old now that's a different story, she will be 3 in March and I'm absolutely dreading it she can be a nightmare at times

Answer

I don't have a 3 year old yet but I want to encourage you. It's all temporary! Your job is to keep your children safe, loved, and healthy. Do what you gotta do to get through the hard days. Maybe you gave into a few tantrums today because your younger baby was being fussy. Go to bed tonight telling yourself that you did your best! Toddlers feel big emotions that they don't know how to process or communicate very well. Have empathy for that and understand that everything she is expressing is just coming from something she feels and something she wants. Ultimately if she can learn to tell you those things with her words, you'll be able to communicate well. But it will take some time, and she won't be 3 forever. It's probably going to be hard every time. Laugh it off when you can and try to see her frustration from her point of view. When all else fails, you love that kid even when she strikes every last nerve. ❤️ Good luck mama.

Answer

I’m sorta lucky in the sense that I helped raise my baby sisters and experienced their terrible 3’s. So I got a taste of typical 3yo behavior and had to trial and error my reactions, and now with my own kid I have realistic expectations and some idea of what might work, so while I’m sure your younger kids will be challenging it might not be as bad as your first because you’ll have the experience. And with my sisters I then got to watch them grow into less demonic kids and then revert back to demons as teens and now they’re wonderful young adults. Knowing this phase will end helps, and seeing how great my sisters ended up and hoping I can do the same by my own kids makes it worth it. And I try to write down the good moments somewhere so I can go back and read them and remember why parenting is fun.

when dealing with terrible 3's with your toddler is there a part of you that just wants to give up parenting??

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