he CHEATED on me

Okay. I feel shitty. So my boyfriend and I have been together for a couple years. He cheated on me from the start but me being stupid, I stayed. He’s controlling, manipulating, all that toxic stuff. Now of course I have my toxic traits too. Like not communicating, my attitude, etc. We have both been working on ourselves. I’ve fallen out of love and I have a feeling he has also. There isn’t much to our relationship and I love him with everything inside of me but i’m afraid to let him go. I’m still so invested in him and his life. I want to be there every step of the way. I want to guide him and just be his partner, but at the same time I want to be single. I have felt this way for a few months now but I don’t know what to do or say, which is why I’m asking for advice. I feel horrible and so bad for him. Id feel heartbroken if we broke up though. I feel dependent on him and the comfort he brings me. I also am beginning to really like one of my coworkers. It’s innocent and I’d never betray my boyfriend but I can’t help my feelings. I need some good advice and wisdom because I’m young and this is my first serious relationship.