Mother thinks I'm being unreasonable

Monica

My MIL is from the deep depths of hell. I obviously don't get along with or like this woman. I've been with my s.o for 14 years. I tried to get along with her for a long time. Cooked meals for her. Bought her gifts for holidays and birthdays and still nothing. I finally gave up. This woman was never there for my s.o while he was growing up and his godmother practically raised him. She used my s.o basically as a paycheck to pay her bills because she wanted to remain unemployed. I asked him to move out with me and after that she hated me even more. She would show up at my door looking for him but not to ask how he's doing, but to ask for money. After all of this he still gave her chance after chance. Fast forward a few years and we had our first son. When I was in labor she threw a fit because she wasn't going to be in the room while I was delivering. Why would she be? She threatened to call the hospitals if we didn't give her the room I was in, after we advised her we would call her after baby was born for visits. When she visited the next day she criticized my sons name the entire time and proceeded to call him by my s.o's name instead. This went on for a year. She embarrassed us at our sons first birthday party. Something I swallowed my pride for and invited her to. She threw a fit infront of my guest and family members because my son was wearing shoes, the kind that don't require socks worn with them and she proceeded to yell about how I let my son leave the house with no socks. Taking his shoes off and touching his feet making a complete scene. My grandfather tried introducing himself and she completely ignored him. I told my s.o that very night his mother wouldn't be invited to anymore events. He agreed. My mother thinks I'm being unreasonable because I'm asking again for her not to be called, as I'm doing with everyone as well, after the baby is born and ready for vistors. She wants the exact date I'll be having my surgery because she wants to be there. I don't want her there. She's been calling non stop for the past 2 weeks pesturing us for the date. She just won't take "we'll call you as soon as he's here" as an answer. My mother is the type of person that no matter how toxic someone is, they're family regardless. I don't feel this way. I have cut people out of my life, my own father, for being toxic. We should stop being taught and should stop teaching that it's okay to deal work someone simply because they're blood. If you're toxic. You're toxic. I don't care who you are. If you make me unhappy in anyway, then you don't need to be in my life. My mother says I should take my son to see her more. I don't agree. Whenever this woman was involved more in our lives, all we did was fight. It's so much easier to not have her in it. It's better for us and our relationship. I never made excuses for my father or his behavior and I'm not about to do it with her either.