Being a step parent -affecting my marriage

I married a man with a 6 year old son. Unfortunately his child never listens, is beyond disrespectful and it drives me insane.

Dad seems to think he's an angel but the lack of respect I receive (from both of them) is really making me question my marriage.

I understand I'm not his mother, but the child needs to listen and respect me.

When he's doing something he shouldn't and I make that known, my husband shouldn't freak out.

His child is almost 7, not 3, we don't need to continue babying him. Just because he says "I can't do it!" Doesn't mean he cant. As a parent i feel we have to push kids and give them direction so they realizes they can do things by themselves, it will give them more confidence and less apt to be lazy when they are older.

The fact that we are clearly on 2 different pages scares me to death. My husband and his son make me not want to have my own kids for more than 1 reason.

I'm sure I'll get a bunch of you telling me how selfish I am, but I know I can't be the only one that's feeling this way.