I've been going through a lot recently. I'm young, and learning. But the things that happened were not my fault in any way and I had no control over it.

I've recently been having to go to the drs 4-6 times a month for mental health evaluations & monitoring my weight.

I've been having to see a consular and a psychiatrist.

I've been diagnosed with PTSD , manic bipolar depression , severe anxiety and of course depression but my depression got bad so turned into manic bipolar.

I've realized with how I've been feeling/looking. I'm not ready for a baby. I can barely take care of myself at the moment. With all of these things going on its causing my body to be in pain, and I work 6 days a week & babysit on my day off. So not having any time to rest is killing me. Ugh.

I'm young , I keep trying to rush everything thinking I'm running out of time bc literally anything can happen that maybe will prevent me from having children which is something I've wanted most in this world

I hope one day when I'm healthy , strong & happy again I will get the chance.

My period starts in a couple days now. After my period stops I am going on birth control and having protected sex only with my husband.

I know what it's like having a toxic mother and I dont want to be one.

I literally have nobody to talk to but my dr & when I have emotional breakdowns I just get told to calm down from my husband so this is the only place I have to vent really. Sorry for a long post.

Good luck, and may you all get what you've been wishing/praying for.