To ivf or not?

Question

I’m trying to decide if we will do Ivf or adopt? If you’ve been thru it and were successful or not I’d love to hear any of your thoughts being on the other side of it or currently doing it ...??? 
I turn 40 in a couple weeks. I’ve done 5 IUIs Jan- Jun this year. We had a stillbirth in June 2017 at 24weeks they say maybe was due to growth restriction due to my high BP (which I take meds for to control - nifedipine) but also undetermined. That pregnancy, I was 3 months off my IUD and we got pregnant naturally & quickly until it all ended horrificly. I was 37 then. I’m approaching 40 and January will be 3 years since I became pregnant w our stillborn. I just don’t want to spend $80k (which is what we were advised for 3 cycles for a 65% chance) and be another year down the road w no baby and still need to spend another $40-$60k or so to try to adopt which will take another year. The IUIs were very emotionally draining so I am not sure what we can really handle at this point but still holding on to some hope & hoping there are some success stories out there

Answer

I did two unsuccessful IUIs. Chickened out on the IVF bc of some initial pain (I’m a big baby but later learned I could’ve taken some extra strength Tylenol). I gave up bc I talked myself into thinking that if I could not take that pain how could I deliver a child. Dumb right, yeah I know. Since I’ve always wanted to adopt, I got certified with the state to foster to adopt. It’s a long wait but I’m waiting, it’s been 5mo now. Now I’m really considering the IVF again. I just don’t want to have any regrets later.

Answer

I’m 40 and IUI didn’t work for me but IVF did. We still don’t know what was the reason ttc (3-4 years) or IUI didn’t work but it could be my lining, not sure. I did a lot more acupuncture w/ IVF and was on lots of hormones and multivitamins. 
Do try fertility acupuncture if you can. Does wonder to the body, especially calming energy. 
Money is insane w IVF but it did work. How much would it be to adopt? I really want to adopt a kid too. You can’t go wrong with either but don’t get discouraged by your age and don’t let doctors talk you down about that. Take it with grain of salt. You’re their bread and butter and you can do anything you want. Just don’t give up!!

Answer

I'm 38, and I tried IVF, but it failed. The older you get, the less chances you have of IVF being successful. Egg quality and quantity simply diminish. We chose to use a donor egg. Do whatever feels right for you. ☺️

Answer

I tired one medicated IUI and 2 rounds of IVF and got nothing. The first IVF I had only 2 embryos that “made” of and one that survived long bought to test for Genetic testing came back abnormal. My second IVF was going well but at the egg retrieval my follicles were “empty” and Dr. had no reasons why for me. So even though the Dr. hasn’t said, I think that was a mixture of bad timing and probably my age. I was over 40.  41 and 43 during these.

Answer

My husband and I tried several rounds of IUI and decided we were more interested in being someone's parent and didn't want to put ourselves into debt to try and have a baby.  We read through adoption agencies paperwork and stumbled into foster care.  Best decision and most stressful one.  After 2 years we now have adopted 2 sisters who we've had since birth.  We were called multiple times within a 1.5 years for other placements but didn't want to take on too much.  We still try to have one naturally but we don't focus on it any more due to we now have a 3 and 2 year old at home.

Answer

I’m in my mid 30s did all the paths of fertility treatment spending %30 of the cost of a house overall. I have one daughter, currently pregnant with baby #2 have had miscarriages and chemical pregnancies throughout our 7 year journey. If this round of frozen transfers runs out we are adopting.
Because for me the 2-20 people constantly in your privates, complications and risks I faced, and the constant worry, watching, not really knowing and trying to approach things as a realist from to many let downs, absolutely %100 killed the magic for me.
I love my daughter and hope we have our second but I still feel like my body failed me and like I missed out of the magical glowing happy times because of infertility. The rollercoaster and cash vacuum that it is we have decided that money would be better spent on a person who is already with us and who has been handed a difficult hand in what ever way that may be. Surrogacy was not an option for us as the only people we would want were our sisters and they both have to many health concerns for pregnancy.
Adoption would have been the right path for us if my daughter didn’t happen and it will be the right path for US if we can’t conceive on what we have left. 
Either way it is a fight. Fighting to bring new life in or fighting to give another child a good life. The fact that you are considering either should be applauded.

To ivf or not?

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