It’s horrible to be posting this but after 5 years of thinking that I was unable to have children the day came in where I decided to do a test and I finally got the answer I was looking for! I was in shock and my partner was over the moon.

Fast forward to my first scan, I was having bad pains, cramping, pain in the shoulder tip but no spotting so went to A&E they did a scan which showed everything was fine and baby had a heart beat....at this moment I started to realise this was real and wasn’t a dream, booked to see my midwife for the 1st time July 25th she said everything was looking well and there was nothing to be worried about... the weeks passed on and finally the day came for my 12 weeks scan (yesterday) me and my partner was all excited expecting to see our baby on the screen with the heart beat bouncing around instead we were told they couldn’t find the baby and had to do a vaginal scan (at this point I knew it wasn’t good news) they found the baby at the bottom of the sack but there was no heart beat, the baby stopped growing at 8 weeks! It was the news that I was not expecting, I didn’t know how to feel, I had no emotion. Anyway I opted for the pills to help with the miscarriage and within 7 hours the baby came away at 5am this morning! It was heart breaking but still I had no emotion! I know it’s in there somewhere! My partner and family are devastated so am I but my emotions just feel like they are numb, I feel numb... I can’t explain how I feel or where I go from here! Just can’t believe my little bean is no longer there 😔😢👼🏼💔