To lose virginity? To someone special or to wait?

Question

I’m not asking for a definite answer but advice.
I may hook up with someone tomorrow and I am debating if I should go all the way with him. I’m 21 and have never dated anyone however I feel like I won’t date anyone or find anyone special to lose it to for a while because of my busy lifestyle. 
I have always said no to save it for someone special, but I kinda want to get it over with at this point? 
What are your thoughts?

Answer

I was just like you. I was (and still am) very busy, I had never seriously dated anyone, and I didn’t think I would anytime soon because of my lifestyle. I also grew up Christian with the mentality that your body is a temple and the man you have sex with should be your husband blah blah blah... I decided to lose mine to a hookup because I wanted to experience sex for myself. I was also 21 and felt like I was being an adult in every other way possible so why not make a decision and enjoy myself? I also questioned the point of saving yourself and why our society is obsessed with virgins. I think it’s a weird fetishization of little girls and the idea of a woman not knowing her body and needing a man to figure it out for her.
We have all the time in the world to fall in and out of love with so many amazing people. You’ll have many first times with many people. None will be the same. The very first time is quite irrelevant and honestly awkward lol. 
Now that I’m with a guy I feel like I’m falling for, every time we have sex is like no other. And I’m glad I didn’t wait and wasn’t a virgin when I met him because I can really enjoy it.
But you decide✌🏾

Answer

I found that for me it was more important that trust  was part of my first time than romance/love was. Trust made my first time feel positive and safe, and like I was opening a new door to life rather than losing or just getting rid of something. I also waited until very recently (I was 20) to have sex and the main reason why is that I wanted to know that my first partner would be concerned with me being comfortable. Whether you have your first time with a boyfriend, husband, or just a stranger or a good friend, something that is important is that you feel like your well-being is as important to them as it is to you.

To lose virginity? To someone special or to wait?

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