Im so depressed. I really hate myself now. I really do. I feel so disgusting and fat. And I am. I have no clothes that fit. The ones that kind of do look terrible. I gained over 50 pounds during my pregnancy. Before my pregnancy i unintentionally gained about 30. 80 lbs. I have stretch marks in places i never thought i would. My bf doesn't act like he's in love with me anymore and i really don't know why he would be. We are both stressed. We haven't had sex since march because he wasn't comfortable doing it while the baby was right there. He always come to kiss me before work. Today he did not. I try to put make up on to make myself feel better and it doesn't even look good at all so i feel worse. Im breastfeeding and one boob is wayyy bigger than the other. My nipples have tripled in size. I've spent pretty much the whole summer inside. I live 1 hr from friends and family. I am absolutely in love with my son but i feel terrible right now.