So this isn’t something I’ve shared with anyone before but it’s effecting me and I’m not too sure why. When I was with My ex boyfriend I felt very pressured into doing things of a sexual nature I wouldn’t want to do anything and he’d get angry at me he’d be kissing me kissing my neck and I’d tell him to stop but he’d carry on and I would try and struggle out of it but I’m the end I thought it would be easier to just lay there and let him do whatever he wanted because no matter how many times I’d say no or try and get him off me he would pretend he didn’t hear me. He’d say you want it you know you do when I didn’t want anything ever from him. There was one time where he got me drunk and pretended to get drunk himself I didn’t know what I was doing and even then I said no, he took advantage of this and did things I would never enjoy, other methods of sexual activity from behind to put it politely, but I I didn’t know what to do I feel it’s my fault. I don’t know if this is rape or sexual abuse but ever since then it’s made me feel I’m not validated unless I sleep with men he used to get angry and not speak to me if I didn’t sleep with him so I’d do it just so he’d be nice too me. Ever since I’ve felt men won’t accept me unless I sleep with them and it wasn’t until my recent boyfriend whom I’m stillwith, that I realised it was totally wrong. I’m not sure why I’m sharing this I guess u just want validation on whether it was rape or sexual abuse or anything along those lines. Anyone have any advice or have any insight as to how I get over this x