My heart hurts.
I don’t know why it keeps happening to me. I meet a guy, we get along great, and things start turning towards the direction of me and them possibly being in a relationship. We get INSANELY close, and then all of a sudden they have a full blown girlfriend. This most recent one is by far the worst though. I feel awful. Absolutely awful. I got played so bad this time. He constantly flirted with me, held my hand, called me cute, was always finding a way to touch me, we slept in the same bed often times, and SO MANY OTHER THINGS. Then today I get a text telling me he was seen walking around our college campus hand and hand with someone. It immediately broke my heart. I was hoping after the summer apart from each other that something could possibly happen between the two of us this semester. I guess not though. I cared for him so much I prayed for his safety, well-being, and everything else in the book because I can’t even imagine what life would be without him in it or if I lost him. It just hurts so bad. The reason I never made a move was because I didn’t want to ruin the friendship which i guess was a good move because this hurts like hell and we were never actually together. We never even kissed. It absolutely sucks. I might have to take a mental health break from all social media and just quarantine myself in my room blasting music until I get a handle on this. I’m just so, so hurt and I don’t understand anything at all right now. I’m blindsided.
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