Abusive ex

My ex was never physically abusive, he was very emotionally and verbally. It changed after about a year and a half. He was my best friend I could tell him everything and we’d laugh about nothing.. I don’t know what happened but I slowly started to see someone else in him. He has serious issues that started to come to light.. I had to leave for my daughter.. he’s never shown her this side but I didn’t want to risk it..

We were the perfect disaster. It finally stopped June 1st, no calls, nothing.

Here I am, in bed- missing my best friend. He tried reaching out to me once, I never responded. I’m just so heartbroken because he did this, we never had to be out to enjoy each other. We’d bake cookies and watch movies and laugh at each other and with each other.. I’m crying because he was the man I wanted to marry.. I have so many unanswered q’s.. for him & for myself.. how can I still love him? How can I still be crying over him over us..

Will I move on? Or hold onto the reasons why I had fallen for him.. the person I use to love

I’m sorry ladies, just one of those nights