Back story - I have 3 kids, married for 19 years. With the last two pregnancies, I ended up being hospitalized several times due to preterm labor( both my babies were born healthy even though premature). During that time my husband would just drop me off at the hospital and tell me to call him when I heard what was going on. Wonderful right??? He always told me he couldn’t miss work.

For several years, he never did anything with his kids. It was always assumed I was a single parent...and not saying that in a bad way. I was there and I am still there for anything my kids have - while working full time and going to school at night part time.

Well fast forward 18 years. My spouse and I have had some serious arguments about when he should be in our lives etc. I’ve told him I was done. Well he said he wanted to change and that he wanted to be together and make things work and be there for us.

This week, my oldest has graduated and moved out to college. Guess who looked like a single parent again. That’s right, this mom.

After taking all day to move my child, he had the nerve to ask what took so long and that I should have left earlier. I lost it. When I brought it up that I expected him to be there to help and he wasn’t I was told that I didn’t have the right to criticize when he does or does not take off. That I never take off on the days that he wants me to ( ie his birthday) so why should he take days off. He also told me that I should have told him I wanted him there as he doesn’t know these things - now take it, he asked several times over the last month when move in day was.

Why in the hell do I need to tell him when he needs to be there for his kids. It should be a given! Does this mean I’m going to ha e to remind him that he needs to be at his kids wedding?

Signed...

Fed up, pissed, and emotional mom.