I just feel like I’m a fat ugly lazy piece of shit. I can feel something different around us. Something shifted and I just feel like I’m going to lose him. I feel like he’s too good for me and I don’t deserve him. I feel like all I’m doing is keeping him from a better life with someone who is better than me in every single way. I feel like i’m not doing enough.. I feel like I’m not being the best that I can be for him. I’m not pulling my weight and I’m not being the support system he needs. I just don’t know how I can do all of this and be that supportive person who had his back and lifted him like I use to. I can’t even lift myself up.. I cant find the motivation, the energy, the will to do it even when the thought of him leaving me over this dances across my mind.. I feel so alone and he begs me to let him back in and open up again but I can never find the words and it just hurts him even more. I don’t know what I’m doing anymore...