I'm currently sat crying my eyes out and I dont know what to do.

Long story cut slightly short I have been with my partner for nearly 3 years.

Anyway when we first got together he was seeing his 2 beautiful children from his previous relationship, however the mother of them got pregnant by another man and stopped him from seeing them.

Fast forward to 4th august he gets a message from her asking if they can start on a clean slate and that he can see the kids but she has to be present for the first few times and she wants money from him. I have since found out that she has split from this other man and he does not eant anything to do with his son so she is now managing 3 kids and not working.

She is trying to manage 3 kids which I can image is very hard as I only have the 1.

Anyway i love seeing my partner happy and him seeing his kids made my heart melt, but I could only see photos as she didnt want me to be around them.

I only asked him to let me know when she speaks to him so I know for my own peace of mind, but he dont. Then I'm having to sit there trying to think how I can ask him without sounding like a crazy woman.

Anyway for the past 2 weeks we have been bickering and it all end up to about her who is now trying to be all nice to him acting like nothing has happened and she never stopped him seeing his kids for the past 2 years and 4 months. His sat on the sofa messaging her while I'm in the other side waiting for a cuddle. He has assured me that nothing is ever going to happen because he does not like her one bit for what she has done to him and I am the only one he wants but I cant help and think that she is after him because of how much he is a good dad and how much he earns etc.

Fast forward to Friday 16th he tells me he is staying later from work and then doesn't come home at all. Btw this used to happen alot as he used to go out and get drunk and come home the next morning, but as I didnt like it he stopped for a while, well until friday.

I then get a message saturday morning around 6ish saying that he needs a break because he cant focus on his children while he is living with me (we moved into our first home in February).

He came back around 8ish and packed some bits up and I completely broke down, I mean I have never sobbed so much in my life to the point where my daughters dad has to come and get her because I didnt want her to see me like this.

He told me i needed to stop being insecure but due to my past i genuinely cant help it and he knows this, and blamed me for pushing him away. He knows I go down his phone just like he knows my password if he wants to go on mine, however he recent changed his password making my insecurity 10 times worse.

All I want to do is hear his voice and tell him that I love him and I will try my utter best to stop being insecure but I will need reassurance and it will take time.

When we are good we are very good, I worship the ground he walks on and I do everything for him and never ask for anything back.

We was supposed to be taking my daughter on her first holiday in 2 weeks and he has told me to go on my own, it my birthday next weekend and I will now be spending it on my own.

I dont want to hear all of people who are going to say **ah walk away, forget him, blah blah**

I have NEVER loved someone like this before and I want this to work but I dont want to keep bombarding him with calls and texts but I am sat on my own in our first flat that I cant afford on my own.

I dont know what to do all I want to do is cry and cry and cry.

If anyone has been through this please message me I need to know how the hell to cope though this.