I’ve been so blessed that I have had 9 months to stay at home with my little man. My husband works 6 days a week from 6am to 5pm M- f and 7am-12pm on saturdays to support us. However, we are ready to buy a house (by next summer) and we need to save some more money.

I have a masters degree and do not want to have it not be used but the thought of going back to work is scaring me to death. I don’t want to leave my son. I don’t want to miss his first steps or hear his voice. I’m having anxiety just getting ready for my interviews. On top of that, daycare has been a nightmare to find. I worked in multiple daycares growing up so i know warning signs when I see them. I have one that I’m ok with and I personally know the owner. But my son has never spent more than a few hours away from me. He still breastfeeds and likes to be held while he naps.

I know it’s not fair for my husband to be the sole provider for our family and work as hard as he does. But I can’t shake the fear and the guilt of leaving him. My husband wants me to stay at home but I know our financial needs.

Any advice or thoughts?