When I was 16 years old I missed my period for over a month after having unprotected sex. I was in a very bad place mentally at the time, the boy I was with was mentally abusive and used me for just sex. I was depressed and self harmed. I was too afraid to take a pregnancy test. But after missing my period for so long I was pretty sure at the time that I was pregnant. I ended up harming myself physically in my lower abdominal area. I remember I had horrible bruising and cramps followed by a heavy period 2 days later with lots of clots. I will never know for sure if I was indeed pregnant or if it was my period and I’ll always live with that guilt regardless. 10 years later I am married to a wonderful man. I got out of that dark hole and we want to start a family . I want a baby more than anything and I know I would be a good mother. I pray everyday for a child but after 2 years of ttc we have not gotten pregnant. I have (Pcos and he has male factor) but I still think that god is punishing me for what I did so long ago. Or this is karma. Idk I just feel guilt and sadness everyday. I regret what I did everyday. And I will never even know if I was actually pregnant.