This is a long story I’m trying to make it short and English is not my first language so bare with me pls.

I met my ex a year ago, and we instantly connected, we went out one time, and talked constantly, he said he really liked me, I freaked out because I had never been on a relationship and I was scared of falling in love with him, so I ghosted him... we never talked again until, well, suddenly in May, I got a text from him saying that we should meet for coffee.

When we met I can’t just explain how perfect everything was, he said that he spend the entire year thinking about me, he remembered my birthday, and other details, and he wanted to know why I suddenly disappeared. I told him I was scared, and during all that first month he was so attentive and proved me he really liked me, told me he could never hurt me, earn my trust, and I met his family, and did sleepovers, he respected that this was new to me and I really felt that we were on the same page. I fell in love with him so hard, and I know he did for me too.

The thing is, and I always made this clear from the beginning, that I was moving away for at least 5 months to London in September, he told me not to worry about that now, but then at the end of July, he started to get really distant, and stop texting me much, which was really weird bc we talked every day, and I stayed at his house all the time, until a week went by without us seeing each other, so I asked what was wrong, and he told me he was an asshole because he didn’t talked about this to me, but that he was distant because he didn’t wanted to get hurt, and I was leaving, that he was so in love with me he could not bear the fact that we were getting so serious for nothing because I still was going to London, and he wanted me to make my dream come true.

We then saw each other and officially broke up, he told me he loved me, and said that this wasn’t the end.

It was my first break up so I didn’t take it well, and we constantly talked and argued, and he ended up apologizing and I ended up crying, until one day he blocked me from instagram, and I realized he deleted my number on WhatsApp because I could not see his picture, and I texted him saying that he should stop playing games, and tell me if I should forget him forever, or we could try when I come back. He left me on read.

So I blocked him and decided to move on but I am so sad, I’ve tried everything and I can’t help but feel like he doesn’t love me anymore, and didn’t want to fight for us. He did not love me enough.

And I don’t know what to do because I still love him and I want to be together again, but I have to go to London, at least until late January.

What should I do? Should I keep fighting for us or do you think he doesn’t value me and I should move on?