So, bear with me.

My partner, who is American (I’m Australian and over here spending 6 weeks with him!) has a condition called Hidradenitis Suppurativa (which I also have) and he didn’t sleep much last night, because the lesion under his arm has come up and he couldn’t get comfortable. So I know today he’s just been resting. I’ve tried to leave him alone and not flare his Social Anxiety too (me being touchy feely makes him anxious!) But I just feel so helpless that there is literally nothing I can do. I’m in a foreign country, in a foreign town, with no car and no real friends. I don’t want to rely on his female friend (there isn’t anything between them. She’s married) because I believe it should be my job to care for him when he’s feeling like this - but she’s been the one there for him when I haven’t been able to physically.

On top of that - my own anxiety about feeling like I’ve done something wrong is creeping up and I know he wants me to be more confident and be my own person - but after coming out of two abusive relationships 10 years ago - to have a guy that is so caring and thoughtful and protective (not in a possessive way) and loving when his anxiety and HS isn’t flaring.

But I need advice - how can I a) be more confident and b) how can I support him and show him I can help him when he’s not feeling well. I feel like an idiot and a bother asking him all the time if he’s okay.

Thanks.