Parental Genetic Testing?

Please weigh in if you feel able to.

So after out third miscarriage last month, I was genetically tested to see if I have mutations that might be passed down that is causing our miscarriages (I mean I already hit my out of pocket so it was free why not just see)... and I was clean. I was the one we were worried about because I have lupus.

But were trying to think we want to do testing for my husband. It can be up to 2k to do it for him (and hes not normally needing to do medical stuff so it's not like hell hit his OOP maximum or deductible anytime soon).

And all these tests tell you is if you're clean and have bad luck or if you have abnormalities and theres honestly nothing you can do about it but expect more miscarriages in your future.

Reasons against:

1. They're so expensive

2. They test for results that literally cannot be treated. Just knowledge for knowledge sake.

3. They dont provide real answers, just something that feels like finger pointing like "its you're fault".

4. My husband is already so broken over these miscarriages. He doesnt say it but I know we both kind of lean towards it biologically being my body's fault. I'm not sure he could handle a positive result. I've already gone through so much grieving feeling like it's my fault and I'd never want to put him through that.

5. What even is the point of a test that has zero treatment options.

Reasons for:

1. Finality & knowledge

2. Societal pressure to "find out everything you can"

3. (Extremely selfishly) if my husband gets a positive I might finally put to rest the idea that it's my fault (see con #4 though)

Because weve had such extremely different diagnoses (down's syndrome and Turner's syndrome) my doctor doesnt think that there could be a genetic abnormality or mutation that could be causing them.

Anyone willing to weigh in?