Im so torn

I have to make a big decision whether try <a href="https://glowing.com/glow-fertility-program">ivf</a> or not. Im 39 and been ttc 2 years. If <a href="https://glowing.com/glow-fertility-program">ivf</a> was a guaranteed thing I'd do it no problem. But being older it's such a financial risk as they may not retrieve many eggs. I think I'd be destroyed if we spent the money and it didn't work. I believe with every ounce of my being I will have a child but how can I know if God expects me to do <a href="https://glowing.com/glow-fertility-program">ivf</a> or not? I had 3 failed iuis and i was certain God was gonna bless me on those. What if <a href="https://glowing.com/glow-fertility-program">ivf</a> ends up the same? The pain of infertility is so intense i cannot describe it. Im trying so hard to forget about kids all together bc this just hurts so bad. As bad as it seems i just feel in my heart Like God can give me a baby and i shouldn't need <a href="https://glowing.com/glow-fertility-program">ivf</a>. I need encouragement and direction 😥 my age is the most stressful part about it.