When is it okay to...

Have sex with a guy? I know everyone is different but I’m weird about it. I feel guilty after having sex. I’m 23 and still finding out what I like because of shitty sex with an ex and idk how to feel. I almost feel used but I know I wanted it. Guys say they want a relationship and still talk to me after but I’m afraid they are just lying to me to get sex. I guess I over think it. Is it okay to want to pleasure someone? Like I don’t even know what to think?? My brain is messed up. Last time I had sex was also the first time I got high and it was so good. Do you feel bad about sleeping with multiple people at once? I know I don’t have any STDs but I’m not on the pill right now. A guy came inside me and I took the plan b pill the next day. Another guy I’ve been talking to for the longest time wants a bj. I feel like a total slut but I also feel like I need to find out what I want. Society glorifies hoe culture but I’m just confused because I want to be free like that but I also know it’s bad. A closeted slut 😭