Hi ladies, I have an etiquette question. I am a bridesmaid in a friend’s wedding, and her bachelorette party is next month. It’s a wine tour. I’ll be just over 7 weeks when it comes around. Normally I would be fine to go and just not drink, and explain what’s going on to the other attendees, but I have three other friends who will be there, and one of them dates someone I work with. They all still talk to my coworkers (they’re former coworkers of mine). I love them, but I do not trust two of them to keep my secret, and the coworker-boyfriend is a gossip. I am really not ready for people at work to find out. I am a big wine lover normally and I wouldn’t be able to fool anyone by not drinking on the tour.

What would you do? My husband thinks I should explain to the bride and not go, but I feel bad. Do I just hope my friends don’t talk? Or maybe I could tell people I have a conflict for Saturday, go for Friday night, and then come home the next morning before the tour?

Thanks in advance for any advice!