Calling your current baby a rainbow baby is offensive and basically considering them a replacement/bereavement child?

Question

I saw this on a forum today and I was absolutely bewildered by it, I completely just don’t understand how someone could see referring to your child as a rainbow baby like this? Can anyone help me understand this point of view better as i can usually understand both sides of things but this? I’m struggling with. I thought the literal term of a rainbow baby is a child conceived after a miscarriage yet it’s being made to sound like an awful thing to say? Help

Answer

People get offended over the stupidest crap. The baby isn't a replacement. It's a happy outcome after a loss. ...the rainbow after the storm so to speak. My 3rd daughter is a rainbow baby because I lost my 3rd pregnancy post heartbeat. I still wish I could have had that baby, plus her. No one can replace a lost baby. But my pregnancy with her was difficult because of my loss, I worried a lot my whole pregnancy, so her resulting in a healthy birth was definitely celebrated.

Answer

I think people are just too damn sensitive about things these days. It’s just words for goodness’s sakes. How you treat and raise your child is what’s important. Yes, I had a miscarriage. Am I sad about it, yes of course I am. Is this child I gave growing inside me a replacement? Absolutely not. Will I treat him as a replacement. Heck no. Will he know I had a miscarriage before him? Maybe when he gets older and has an understanding for it. Will he feel less if my child or second best? Absolutely not. People need to stop getting their panties in a bunch about nothing.

Answer

That is the dumbest thing I’ve ever read 🤦🏻‍♀️ It’s not referring to a “replacement child” as this person so naively puts it. You can tell this was written by a disturbed millennial baby 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️ After the storm comes the rainbow meaning after the loss of a child this new life comes into the picture giving your life new meaning and a fresh start. Like after it rains the rainbow shows up with the sunshine. Ugh ppl are dumb.

Answer

I don't really like the term either. I agree with that post, but not really as strongly as her. I think it's acceptable to talk about and remember your lost babies, and even educate your children about them. I'm a "rainbow baby" as well. Honestly though, most people are. Many many women lose pregnancies at varying stages before finally delivering a healthy baby. But calling your baby a rainbow baby is kind of silly to me. Maybe when you first find out, and its said as sort of a silly cute thing for a little while it's okay, but the women who go crazy about "omg my rainbow baby this" and "my rainbow baby that" its just...😶🤪 
Losing a child hurts, that's so painfully true. And when you're finally able to have a child after miscarriages and complications, it's exciting and magical. But comparing your child to ones you lost is definitely weird if you make a big deal out of it.

Answer

Sounds like her mom had a really hard time dealing with grief and placed it on her daughter in a way that a small child just can’t handle. Which is just sad. 
Once a child is born, they should definitely be allowed to be their own person and kids are not able to to emotional labor for their parents. That’s super unfair. 
But I don’t think most people who use the term rainbow baby do that. I don’t think it gets used much once the child is a toddler.

Answer

She is dumb asf!🤦🏼‍♀️
When women have a miscarriage & get pregnant again is there rainbow baby!

Answer

This upsets me somewhat. I refer to my baby girl as a rainbow sometimes (18 weeks pregnant now). Our baby that we lost in Feb was planned as was this baby! I do not see this baby as a replacement, or we got pregnant just to help us grieve. Maybe her mom was still struggling when she “had “ her ( had meaning just being born? Idk) I still think of my baby and what could’ve been and I still do get sad, as would anybody. On the 17 will be the due date of that baby and I am uncertain of how I feel or will feel when that day comes. I will never forget the pain I felt when we lost ours, but that doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy this pregnancy, separately, if that makes sense.

Calling your current baby a rainbow baby is offensive and basically considering them a replacement/bereavement child?

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