I dont know how to deal with not having my fiance next to me anymore. I knew it was going to be hard when he told me he was going to enlist in the military. But I never thought it would get me this depressed. I work two jobs and I was going to college but I lost interest in it so I quit. He left around a month ago, I have been getting his letters consistently and I have been writing him too. I love him and he says my letters help him to push through, but this is only a month and it sucks that at some point I'm going to be away from him for up to 18 months and it's going to feel like a century away from him.

There is not a keep yourself busy for me , because I will always end up thinking about him no matter what I do. I just wish I was less emotional about the whole thing and sometimes I even wish I didnt care that he was away. However I will support him because he always wanted to be a soldier even before he met me and I'm not going to take that away from him.