Honestly I don't care if anyone sees this I'm just writing this to vent. I have a problem with orgasming and it sucks. I feel inadequate as a woman and like I let all my partners down. It makes me so sad knowing it's a turn off when I can't. A lot of the men I end up with are givers and want it to happen so badly. I've faked it so many times mainly during hookups but in a relationship I don't really want to lie about it. I just feel so sad and upset because there's nothing I can do about it. What I really need to do is go to a sex therapist and talk about my fear of it but I can't afford it. I know people find it so sexy when a woman can squirt and orgasm in like 20 minutes or less but I just can't. I can't at all. I feel like breaking down and crying. I'm seeing this new guy and no doubt he'll be disappointed. I don't wanna disappoint anyone. He won't understand, no one does. I really hate myself for it. I'm just a malfunctioned woman.