Why are moms and mother in laws so invasive?

My mother in law wants to be called ma ma...... i told her that's too close to mama and she still is insisting she be called ma ma........she constantly asks me if she can take the baby for over nights... I already told her she can come over any time she wants to see baby, but she insists on taking her by herself to her house.. which is an hour away from where I live. Yesterday we went to dinner and in the car I was rubbing my belly because I like to soothe the baby and pat her bottom, she for real asked me why I was touching her so much.... ugh how to deal with out being mean, I know she's excited but like back off let me be a mom first