I have been with my bf for 4 years and since he was a teen he has always played rugby which involves training Tuesday and Thursday nights and playing matches Saturday lunch time and then they all go on to pubs then town so usually he won’t get home till early hours..

anyway long story short this would cause us to have arguments a lot as he would get black out drunk spend 100’s, usually lose something ( wallet or phone or keys ) and not remember a thing.

For the past year he has dropped back how much he plays / trains - partly because of our arguments but also the fact he is not as committed to it as he use to be so usually cant be bothered to play.

But he still tends to play the odd game on a Saturday and will ask me to pick him up at a set time ( usually 8pm ) so I won’t hear from him from 12pm onwards and it’ll get nearer to the pick up time and still no word so I know this means he is enjoying himself and wants to stay later.. usually I’ll text him to remind him I’m coming.

so am I wrong to make him come home? Or should I relax and take a step back and just pick him up later?

He is 23 and earns his own money, he’s old enough to make his decisions but I’ve seen it so often when he comes home.. no money left, keys lost, phone cracked or lost :(