Okay, so this happened to me today. Just sitting in the women's restroom doing my own business when a woman came in and decided to choose the stall next to me instead of one of the other 10 empty ones. (That in itself is rather annoying, even more so since I was trying to discretely excrete, if you know what I mean) She then proceeds to pull out her phone and make a call. 

I'm sitting there on the toilet with the paper seat cover getting itchy because I'm trying my best not to be in this woman's phone conversation... The call is lasting too long and I need to get back to work, and it's been so long that my toes were going numb. 

And then it happened. 

The tiniest whips of air exited my bum and she goes off on me. "Really?!" She said, "I'm on the phone and you  are over there taking a shit?! That's so nasty! No body wants to hear you fart!" To which I retort "Excuse me for taking a poo in the bathroom... No one told me it was a phone booth!" 

Sorry for the rant, but dont use your phone in the bathroom, and don't take the stall next to someone if there are plenty of empty ones. Also, everyone poots but not everyone wants it announced to the world when they do. 

Bathroom etiquette, super simple stuff.