Hi ladies,

So, I’ve been struggling with this for a little over three years now and have just recently gotten more comfortable with talking about what happened and working through all of the emotions that follow. I was sexually assaulted three years ago and it originally didn’t impact me. Soon after it happened I got into a committed relationship and put the incident behind me and just didn’t think about it. While in that relationship though I brought up what happened with my boyfriend and how I was triggered by oral sex. Well, he never really reacted to what I had told him and would still ask me to give him blowjobs. I always felt guilty saying no so eventually I just did it and would go back to that same place mentally I was in when I was sexually assaulted. I would feel weak and scared and not the strong woman I know I am.

Since that relationship ended I haven’t been able to be intimate with anyone beyond kissing. I more recently realized that how my ex had handled me being open and vulnerable with him and not respecting my limits has had potentially a bigger impact on me than the assault itself. I’m also realizing that I should probably seek professional help in a counselor, but I’m trying to figure out how to address that with my family.

Anyways, I’m still young and feel like there’s this whole other part of my life that I’m missing out on by not being able to be sexual or confidently show off my sexuality. Has anyone else been through something like this and have any advice on how to regain their confidence and trust sexual partners again?