Have you ever wondered?

Have you ever sat & wondered how your life would be if you sat & waited on the person you wanted to be with to come back home but instead you married someone else? Sat & wondered if your life would be less shitty, less depressing, less degrading you cuz you “don’t help with anything” but yet you stay at home all the time taking care of everything around the house including the kids all by yourself(cuz he thinks that a woman should stay at home & do everything while a man works) cuz you can’t go & try to get a job cuz the one you married chooses to do stupid shit & now you have no vehicle. Who don’t care about anybody’s feelings but their own. Who does stuff that you hate just cause they’re grown & they can do whatever they want cuz it “helps them” & they’re not gonna stop doing it, but you don’t want it around you or your kids. But even though you have no car, no job, no money (cuz he keeps it all) & you hardly have anybody to run to when you want to leave cuz you’re about fed up with everything, you get threatened with death & the death of anybody who tries to help you if you want to take your kids with you. Cuz I have & idk how I’ve put up with being downgraded, being depressed, being more suicidal than ever for the past 9 years