My mom friends suck. Am I being dramatic?

So my son is about to turn 2 in a few days and his birthday party was yesterday, I invited my 2 friends over a month ago and they both live less than 5 minutes from me and have no job. Well neither showed up. My one friend T messaged me in the morning saying that she didnt feel good, but then later admitted today she just stayed up too late and didn't feel like going out after I sent her a ? After I saw that she was going to get her nails done on her snapchat story yesterday afternoon. My other friend A just didnt show, but shes been posting constantly about how she has no friends. A month ago my friend A's daughter turned 2 and I showed up early to help her set everything up and bought her daughter some presents. I'm getting upset because I watch their kids constantly for free constantly and sometimes for 12+ hours, I buy my friends kids clothes and books and toys. I genuinely care about their kids but when it comes to my son they can't even take an hour out of their day to show up to his birthday? They never babysit, whenever he acts out in public they judge me for not spanking him (hes partially blind so he has horrible anxiety in stores.) My grandpa passed last week and it was incredibly hard, I spent the last 6 months helping my grandma care for him and his funeral service was Saturday and neither of them even reached out to see if I was ok. Is this typical or are these crappy friends?