Baby blues or PPD/PPA? Long please read

Question

Hi all. I’m a FTM and am not sure what the difference between baby blues and postpartum anxiety and depression is. I’m 6 weeks postpartum and when I first had my daughter of course life was overwhelming; we just had a baby and our lives were changing. At first I was crying when being overwhelmed with the responsibility of being a new mom so I stopped breastfeeding about 1 week in. When the hormones associated with that were gone I felt better. Now I’m feeling extremely anxious whenever my baby is around. Nighttimes i dread and stress out about if I’m gonna sleep is she gonna sleep? Sometimes I don’t want to watch her and feel it would be best if my mom or MIL watched her. On days where she cries and fussed I get no break and literally don’t want to be in our house. I feel best when I’m away from our house and at my parents. I feel guilty and feel like a terrible mom when I have to ask for help midweek when I feel like I’m going to breakdown and not make it. I’m embarrassed that I can’t even seem to calm or take care of my baby 7 days a week without asking for help. Any advice moms? Should I seek medical help?

Answer

I think you should check with a doctor to be safe. However, I was kind of the same when I had my first. I did want to be with him every second but being on my own with him was very overwhelming and I was scared every time I knew I would have to. I didn't have any help available so it got worse before it got better. But I did ask my doctor and I never had ppd, just normal feelings. I learned to be a calmer mother and now I enjoy it a lot.

Answer

Honestly I think you should.  I am the same way when I am not on my meds. I get way to overwhelmed and when I am on meds I love being around my LO even when she is screaming and crying, I just hold and kiss her. With my first it took me about 6 months before I finally got help and I really wish I would of sooner with her.