I started getting involved with someone for the first time since my last breakup, which was 8 months ago. It started out as us hanging out as friends, progressed into something physical, and he first asked me on a date in September. Since then, we’ve gone on multiple dates with more in the works, set aside time to see each other often, and I spend the night at his place every Thursday. He’s a perfect gentleman and communicates his feelings better than anyone I’ve ever been involved with.

The problem is, we were both burned pretty badly from our last relationships. His lasted four years and ended in a nasty fight and mine lasted a year and a half and ended with him telling me he was in love with someone else the whole time. We’ve been taking things very slowly for that reason. He’s thanked me often for respecting his boundaries, not being angry when he needs to reschedule or cancel, and for letting him take his time. He says he likes me a lot and that feels scary and unusual for him so he doesn’t want to mess things up. My brother knows him and told me that while he likes him and approves of our involvement, I should know that he’s “easily frightened” and shouldn’t take it personally if he gets overwhelmed and ends things.

I like him a lot and I want to let him know I would say yes if he asked me to make things official, but I don’t want to scare him by adding unnecessary pressure or expectations. Should I just keep rolling with an already healthy dynamic and wait to see how things go, or should I tell him how I feel?