I will spare you the details, long story short, I had very traumatic days after birth at the hospital resulting in a severe depression, which lead to breastfeeding problems and had to switch to formula. It was so severe that we moved in with my parents for 2 months. And while I was caring for my baby, I was not the only one who did it. I got help from my mom and my husband too. Then my mom went back to work and we hired a nanny. In the end, my son had 4 caregivers (parents, my mom and nanny) instead of one.

Now he’s 16 weeks old and I feel he doesn’t even know I’m his mom. He gets what he needs, he smiles and loves all 4 of us and isn’t attached to me at all. In addition, he is a very high needs baby so I wasn’t even able to take him anywhere with me. He just screams all the time (had him checked numerous times, nothing’s wrong). I want to fix this, my depression is gone, I am finally able to enjoy my son but maybe it’s too late? Have I ruined him by stripping him from bonding and forming a secure attachment with his mother? I mean, he likes spending time with me but he also likes spending time with other caregivers so he may be confused. I don’t know, I just want him to be healthy and happy and I want to do my best. I just fear I already ruined him or it’s too late to form this special bond everyone is talking about. Also, not being able to breastfeed makes everything worse and I blame my problems on this

I forgot to mention, I was sick for a week and had to be hospitalized. I came back today and he doesn’t seem to mind or be happy to see me. He was perfectly fine without me which is comfortable and heartbreaking at the same time. I hope he dod not forget me. I’m really doing my best and i turned i to his primary caregiver. I hope it’s not too late