I kinda need help and guidance. And not any hateful answers because I’m not well as it is... My therapist cancelled last minute on the 14th (I LITERALLY pulled up in the driveway and the office said she had to cancel- hour long drive there too.) I have mental illnesses that make expressing things extremely difficult but I’m going to try my best here.

Well, long story, but I tried to break up with my boyfriend because I’m not happy, this isn’t the first time I’ve tried, but the third, I don’t see this going anywhere, but he’s saying things like “why throw 4 months of everything away,” “I’ll do better.” “I thought we were fine yesterday.” “I’ll get a better job next year.” Then he said that I was making my son lose yet another father figure (my fiancé passed away when he was 3 months)

He said there’s not many guys out there who don’t drink, smoke, or cheat. And that the strongest couples get through things.

... I feel like he’s trying to manipulate me... or maybe he really does love me. I’ve told him from the beginning that I will always love my fiancé, but now he’s throwing words around like soul mate and idk I’m feeling uncomfortable because I had everything I ever wanted with my late fiancé. I told him that, and how I feel it’s unfair to both of us, but he just keeps going on about this is all me just grieving. Maybe I am. I am at the point where I’m so stressed out I can barely think.

I told him to give me time to think it over and I’d give him an answer tomorrow afternoon.

I know people who were very loyal to their spouse, and when they became a widow, they met someone within a month or so and seem happier. I thought this would help but if anything this has seemed to make things worse mentally for me. I’m a horrible person. 😩

😫I want to do the right thing but I don’t know what that is.😞