Father in law...

Tomorrow my father in law goes in for a “custom” triple bypass. They are unable to use arteries from his legs and have to take them from his mammories; I’m a nurse I know that being unable to put stents in Monday, to arranging a bypass on Tuesday, then cancelling it because his leg arteries are calcified and he has 3 valves blocked....so they came up with this “custom” idea to try. Either he goes home or there are complications. He is already negative and doesn’t care to do this procedure, from my perspective I think he is scared and is only following what his kids are telling him to do. (Prior to this he has been retired, enjoying life with his 2nd wife and partying with her and their Jimmy Buffet Parrot head friends: making the best of his life as he can at 67). I’m scared for my husband. He’s been crying all week saying he isn’t ready to lose a parent. As a nurse I know how to be a nurse. But as a wife, I don’t know how to be there for him.... please give me advice. If something bad happens; god forbid, I don’t know what to do.

If you lost a parent what do you wish your spouse would have done or done differently?

Or if your spouse lost a parent what did you do...

I wish there was more I could do. I’m so sad for the whole family. I love my father I’m law, but he isn’t my dad and I don’t know how to be there... I want to be the best wife I can be in this difficult time.

(Side note doctors I work with have told me this isn’t the best circumstances because I asked them the truth...)