Scared and mentally exhausted


31weeks with my sweet boy today, had an MRI on his little brain in utero yesterday and an amniocentesis to determine why his brain is swollen and the tubes going to his kidneys are inflamed. Fairly high chance of down syndrome or some form of advanced infection. Won't know for sure until Tuesday when I get my results. I just feel a mess and so out of sorts. My brain is running amuck and I keep breaking down crying because I'm scared. He's so loved no matter what but it's certainly not how I imagined my first pregnancy to be. Feeling quite crampy and uncomfortable still so just trying to take it easy, maternity leave started early so I could take some time out before he comes. Fingers crossed my littlest love is a healthy boy.