I have no one to talk to so I’m posting this here

I have so much weight on my heart right now. And I feel like my soul is sooo tired. I have no one to talk to but I need to get this off my chest. The guy I’ve been with for 5 years puts no effort in this relationship or even in being a father to our almost 3 year old. He has even admitted to not being a family man. And it breaks my heart. Especially for my little girl. She deserves better and more, as do I. But I can’t bring myself to leave... I feel like he chooses everything else over us.. he barely spends time with us and always finds a reason to leave the house. I know he loves our daughter but I think he wishes not to be a dad. I’m so stuck in life right now. I don’t have a job and I can’t find a babysitter, I don’t trust daycares or random people to watch her. She has so many doctors appointments that I’m scared of being fired if I find a job. On top of all of that, I have uncontrolled type one diabetes. I know I’m dumb for not leaving him but I think part of me believes that he can change. I am literally so tired of everything that I don’t want to be around my daughter that much. She’s with me 24/7 and I never have help with her. Don’t get me wrong, I love her more than anything but I just want a break for once. I’m distancing myself from my boyfriend but he doesn’t seem to care. I’m so lost