Does anyone else feel a bit uneasy when taking their infant to big family get togethers?

Question

I love to bring my little girl (8 months old) to social gatherings like Thanksgiving and show her off and let her meet people, but I also find that once we get there I feel uneasy when she’s being passed around. A great grandparent gets her and I’m nervous she’s going to be too heavy or flail put of their arms, someone else gets her that hasn’t washed their hands and is touching all over her hands that promptly go into her mouth, someone else gets her and I can tell she’s uncomfortable with them because she doesn’t know them and they are overwhelming. I feel like when we walk in the door people swarm the cute baby (they probably aren’t but it’s how I feel). 
I don’t want her to live in a bubble but just wanted to know if other new mommas feel this way at different events like this? 
Picture just because 😍

Accepted Answer

Yasss! I feel all of this. Ugh! It’s the worst. It sucks even more when they’re crying and reaching for you, and you have to pry the baby out of an insistent relative’s arms. Give me my baby! 🤪

Answer

YES. I don’t mind her being held as long as she’s happy, their hands are clean, they don’t kiss her, and they don’t leave the room with her. My MIL rolls her eyes when we ask her to wash her hands and her kids hands before touching our five month old. And I absolutely hate when someone is holding her and leaves the room with her. It gives me anxiety.

Answer

I’m not a new mom (I have an 11 year old as well) and I still feel like this with my 5 month old. As long as it’s not overwhelming you, I think it’s normal.

Answer

I was like this at my son's first Thanksgiving, but he was 2 weeks old. He wasn't a good napper, so I basically held him all the time when we were at home, so by Christmas I was happy to let other people hold him. I even let people take him during coffee hour at church, they never leave the room. But it's what you're comfortable with. I know his cry, and it's annoying when people won't give him back when he's crying.

Answer

Yes! From the time my daughter was born peoole would swarm us at the door, take the carrier out of our arms and tske my baby. Id say ok ill take her back and id get told that i get the baby when she cries. She is almost 2 now and i was just at my in laws house and my mother in law was holding her and she wanted me, and my MIL said no- you see mommy enough. 
Its so hard taking babies to big gatherings they get stressed easily- when she was smaller it was hard to be at those places becsuse everyone would get in her face and she wouldnt like it. I totally understand

Answer

I’m used to big family gatherings and they don’t bother me, but my 16 week old hates them. She’s a complete home body and gets upset around people. She’s such a good baby and never cries much until other people are holding her, and then she sticks out her bottom lip and makes this sort of yelling noise and then if she doesn’t make it back to me after a few minute she starts to cry.

Answer

Totally feel you. I felt this way until 12 months with my daughter, honestly. Then, she was so independent and fast that people couldn’t exactly pass her around anymore. It’ll pass and I don’t think what you’re feeling is abnormal in any way!

Answer

In our family we only have one grandchild so far (who Iives in a different city but comes to visit) and we have always let her come to us if she wants to. We say Hi to her when we/they arrive but don’t swarm or overwhelm her. It’s nicer for them to have their space and approach others when they are comfortable. Just because we love her to bits and can’t get enough of her doesn’t mean she wants to be smothered and passed around like a football lol. I get that it’s hard to get some families to understand though. When our baby is born I plan to wear her/him in a baby wrap on my front when we go to my husbands side of the family for gatherings. That way people don’t feel like they can take the baby out of my arms and I can say that they are sleeping.

Does anyone else feel a bit uneasy when taking their infant to big family get togethers?

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